Help Your Child Thrive With Small Changes
Psychologists like me believe that small changes can make a big difference, and can even change a child’s future.
In my parenting support to families, I encourage them to break things down into small areas of action. This avoids parents from becoming overwhelmed.
In this article I’m going to give you an example of the power of small changes, based on a “real-life” child!
The Science Behind Small Changes
Neuroplasticity in Children
Children’s brains are incredibly adaptable, making childhood an ideal time for small changes to have a big impact.
The concept of neuroplasticity explains how even minimal adjustments in a child’s environment, behaviour, or routines can significantly shape their brain development.
This adaptability is why consistent, positive interactions can bring long-term benefits.
TAKE THE QUIZ!
Habit Formation
Small changes can evolve into lasting habits when you apply them consistently.
By starting with minor, manageable modifications in daily routines, children gradually learn to incorporate these behaviours naturally into their lives.
The Power of Small Changes for Children’s Wellbeing: Case Study
*For confidentiality reasons, Naomi is not a real child but a fictional one based on a combination of children I have worked with over the last 20 years as a child clinical psychologist.
Naomi’s mother Jennifer brought her to see me because she was anxious about school, since starting the new school year.
Seven-year-old Naomi would cry every morning before school. She would also tell her mum she had a tummy ache. She said she didn’t know why she just didn’t like school.
Jennifer didn’t know what was causing the anxiety and didn’t know how to respond as a parent.
Should she be strict with her daughter and make her go to school despite the anxiety?
Or should she empathize and allow her to miss school if she complained of a tummy ache?
It was starting to put a strain on their relationship, not to mention Naomi’s happiness and academic progress.
Small Changes for a Happier Child: Understand the Problem First
Helping your child by making small changes is all very well, but you have to know what to change, and in which order of priority.
In the case described above, the three of us worked on a formulation together. A formulation is something clinical psychologists specialize in. It is when we learn about the difficulties in detail.
We think about what might be contributing to them, from lots of different perspectives.
We think about what might have changed, how the child’s environment might be affecting the problem (for example, too much noise), and many other things.
When there is a problem in school, the psychologist will chat to the teacher or special educational needs coordinator (SENCO/SENDCo). Or, they might spend time observing the child in school.
In Naomi’s case, it turned out that she was struggling with the work, and this was the main reason for her anxiety.
When we looked deeper, we could see that Naomi was bright and could produce a high standard of work. However, she struggled to process and follow instructions. She was easily distracted by background noise, or by another activity.
The main changes this academic year? The classes had been mixed up and her current class was noisier than the previous one.
Furthermore, her new teacher was more softly spoken and therefore didn’t always catch Naomi’s attention.
Small Change, Big Difference!
The teacher agreed that she would give an instruction to the whole class, then follow up with Naomi individually.
She would say Naomi’s name and wait for her to give eye contact. Then she would give a simple instruction (one part at a time only), and ask Naomi to repeat it back to her.
After only a week this started to make a huge difference to Naomi. She could complete her work to a high standard and started to get lots of praise for her efforts. Her confidence soared, and her anxiety disappeared almost overnight.
Making Small Changes for Wellbeing: Have You Got to the Bottom of the Problem?
As you can see, if you get to the bottom of the problem, a small change can massively affect a child’s psychological wellbeing.
This is why psychologists encourage you to focus on small changes, and we notice that these so often lead to micro-improvements which then start to gather momentum and make a real difference.
Small Changes for a Happy & Flourishing Child: Eight Ideas
- Adjust Bedtimes Gradually: Shift your child’s bedtime by just 5-10 minutes earlier each night to help improve their sleep quality without making the change feel drastic.
- Incorporate Daily Reading: Add just a few minutes of reading to your daily routine, gradually increasing the time as your child becomes more engaged. This can enhance their literacy skills and give them academic confidence.
- Introduce New Foods Slowly: Add one new food to your child’s plate at a time, paired with familiar favorites, to ease them into trying diverse flavors and textures without overwhelming them.
- Set Short Play Breaks: Implement brief, scheduled play breaks during homework or chores to increase focus and reduce stress, making tasks more manageable and enjoyable.
- Gradual Tech Time Reduction: Cut back on daily screen time by just a few minutes each day, reallocating this time to outdoor play or creative activities to better balance their routine.
- Encourage Small Acts of Kindness: Grow empathy by encouraging your child to perform small acts of kindness regularly, such as sharing a toy or helping in household chores, which can build social skills and moral values.
- Modify Your Response Style: Slightly alter how you respond to your child’s questions or actions, aiming to be calm and encouraging, to build the connection and ensure your child feels valued.
- Use Visual Schedules: Create a simple visual schedule for daily activities to help your child understand and manage their day better, adjusting the complexity as they grow older.
Related Articles
Is Overprotective Parenting Harming Your Child’s Self-Esteem?
7 Powerful Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Compare Your Child to Others
Night Time Routines for Positive Teen Mental Health
Dr Lucy Russell is a UK clinical psychologist who works with children and families. Her work involves both therapeutic support and autism assessments. She is the Clinical Director of Everlief Child Psychology, and also worked in the National Health Service for many years. In 2019 Lucy launched They Are The Future, a support website for parents of school-aged children.
Through TATF Lucy is passionate about giving practical, manageable strategies to parents and children who may otherwise struggle to find the support they need.
Lucy is a mum to two teenage children. She lives in Buckinghamshire with her husband, children, rescue dog and three rescue cats. She enjoys caravanning and outdoor living, singing and musical theatre.
UK parents! Are you ready to boost your family’s wellbeing and kickstart your child’s journey towards brilliant mental health?
This FREE 20-minute course from Dr. Lucy Russell, with quick-start strategies will help you and your family begin your journey to flourishing mental health!
🔍 What’s Inside?
✅ Quick quiz to assess your starting point
🎥 Short and engaging video lessons
💡 Practical strategies to implement today
Yours for 3 days
In just 20 minutes, I will give you tools to enhance your family’s wellbeing.
Together, we can move towards a calm, happy family life and boost your child’s wellbeing. Get your free course now!
