How Parents Can Handle Panic Attacks in Children Without Triggering More Anxiety
Panic attacks in children involve sudden episodes of intense fear with physical symptoms like racing heart, shortness of breath, and overwhelming terror.
Parents can effectively help by staying calm, using specific breathing techniques, applying grounding methods, offering reassurance without dismissing feelings, and recognizing when professional help is needed.
These are evidence-based approaches which will provide immediate relief and prevent the anxiety from getting worse.
Watching your child experience a panic attack can feel terrifying. It’s just awful seeing them struggling to breathe, hyperventilating, or telling you they feel like they’re dying.
As a parent, your natural response might be to rush in with reassurance or even show your own worry. But these reactions can sometimes make things worse.
What Happens During a Child’s Panic Attack?
A panic attack is an intense physical and emotional response where your child’s body goes into full alert mode.
Their brain triggers a fight-or-flight reaction even when there’s no actual danger.
Physical symptoms include racing heart, shortness of breath, dizziness, nausea (feeling sick), and trembling. Your child might feel an overwhelming sense of terror or fear they’re losing control.
It’s estimated that 2.3% of teenagers are diagnosed with panic disorder. But many more children and teens experience occasional panic attacks without a formal diagnosis.
The good news is there are specific, proven techniques you can use to help your child through these frightening episodes.
Why Might Parents Accidentally Make Children’s Anxiety Worse?
Most parents naturally respond to their child’s panic by saying things like “Don’t worry” or “There’s nothing to be afraid of”, but this approach actually sends the wrong message to your child’s brain. When you dismiss their very real physical sensations, they feel misunderstood and even more alone in their panic.
Another common mistake is showing your own fear or anxiety. Children are incredibly perceptive – if they see you panicking about their panic, it confirms their fear that something truly dangerous is happening.
As a mum of two myself, I realise it can be really tough not to show our own fear and anxiety if our child is panicking. But if possible, try to be that reassuring, containing presence they need in the moment.
The most effective approach combines calm reassurance with specific techniques that acknowledge their experience while activating their body’s natural calming response.
How to Help a Child Through a Panic Attack: 5 Evidence-Based Steps
- Remain visibly calm yourself. Take a deep breath before responding. Your calm presence signals to your child’s brain that there’s no real danger.
- Validate their experience by saying “I can see you’re having strong panic sensations in your body right now. These feelings are really unpleasant, but they can’t hurt you.”
- Guide slow, deep breathing by breathing with them. One simple technique is: Count “in for 4, hold for 2, out for 6” to activate their parasympathetic nervous system (the part of the nervous system that tells the brain and body the danger has passed and we are safe). Balloon breathing is another effective deep breathing strategy.
- Use grounding techniques by asking them to name 5 things they can see, 4 things they can touch, 3 things they can hear, 2 things they can smell, and 1 thing they can taste. “Grounding” means coming into the present moment by focusing on the sensations around you.
- Stay with them until the peak subsides, usually within 20-30 minutes but sometimes more quickly than that. After the panic attack they may be exhausted and need to rest.
When and How to Seek Professional Help For Children’s Panic Attacks?
While occasional panic attacks can be managed at home, seek professional support if your child:
- Has frequent panic attacks that interfere with daily activities
- Starts avoiding places or situations where they’ve had panic attacks
- Shows increasing isolation or withdrawal
- Expresses thoughts of wanting to escape their feelings
Start by speaking to your GP about a referral to children’s mental health services. Waiting lists may be long, so you may wish to get online support to help your child at home in the meantime.
If you are considering private support for your child, you can search for local child clinical psychologists using your postcode at the Association of Child Psychologists in Private Practice (ACHiPPP).
It’s essential that your child psychologist is registered with the HCPC (Health Care Professions Council). Their HCPC number should be displayed on their website. This ensures your child psychologist is fully qualified and insured.
What’s the Best Way to Prevent My Child’s Panic Attacks Long-Term?
The techniques I’ve shared above can really help in the moment. But many families find themselves dealing with a repeating cycle.
We hope our child’s panic attacks won’t happen again. We cross our fingers and carry on. But without a long-term plan, we often end up fire-fighting when the panic returns.
The anxiety hits, we respond, things settle… and then the cycle starts all over again.
What’s the Difference Between Managing and Overcoming Anxiety?
Through my 20+ years working with anxious children both in the NHS and my independent clinic, Everlief, I know that truly overcoming anxiety requires more than just crisis management.
We really need to understand what’s driving your child’s fears and have a proper strategy based on science and evidence.
Most parents try their absolute best with the tools they have. They offer reassurance, encourage brave behaviour, or help their child avoid triggers.
But these approaches often don’t create lasting change.
How Can I Help My Child Overcome Panic Attacks Long-Term?
What works best is a clear, step-by-step approach that helps your child understand their anxiety and build specific skills to face it. As a parent you are perfectly positioned to help your child with this process. You just need the right framework and a bit of support to put it in place.
That’s why I created the Outsmart Anxiety course – to give parents the same proven approaches I use in my clinical practice. The course helps you understand why your child’s brain responds with anxiety, what keeps those patterns going, and the specific steps to help them change.
If you’re tired of feeling out of control with your child’s panic attacks and anxiety, and you know it’s time for some expert support, you will find the course helpful. It comes in age-appropriate versions (Under 12s and Teens) and gives you lifetime access to all materials.
Remember, your child can learn to handle anxiety effectively. With the right approach, you can help them build skills they’ll use throughout their life.
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Dr Lucy Russell is a UK clinical psychologist who works with children and families. Her work involves both therapeutic support and autism assessments. She is the Clinical Director of Everlief Child Psychology, and also worked in the National Health Service for many years.
In 2019 Lucy launched They Are The Future, a support website for parents of school-aged children. Through TATF Lucy is passionate about giving practical, manageable strategies to parents and children who may otherwise struggle to find the support they need.
